Strategy. Innovation. Brand.

Defending Yourself – Is It Really About You?

Has anyone ever unloaded on you verbally? What did you do to defend yourself? Did you lash back? Did you raise your voice? Did you assume that it was about you?

People may lash out at you verbally for many different reasons. They’re having a bad day. Their boss unloaded on them. They didn’t get that promotion. They had a fender bender on the way to work. It’s not always about you. Reacting as if it were about you can make a bad situation worse.

It’s a good time to use your listening skills – ask questions. A few simple questions can clarify the situation, allowing you to choose an appropriate response. If it’s really not about you, then a sympathetic response may be much more appropriate than an angry response. Even if your questions don’t clarify the situation, asking them will give you a little time to think and react with wisdom rather than impulse.

What questions should you ask? Watch the video.

Evaluating Logic Logically

Where you stand depends on where you sit.  If you sit in the Republican caucus, you’ll judge the logic of a Democratic speaker very stringently.  If you sit in the Democratic caucus, you’ll judge the same logic much more leniently.  A neutral observer might judge the same logic in a more balanced manner — but is there really such a thing as a “neutral observer”?  The truth is that we don’t evaluate logic logically.  We trust the logic of those we trust.  We don’t trust the logic of those we don’t trust. Trust is central to the art of persuasion.  Your logic will be accepted much more readily if your audience trusts you.

Are you ready?

Woody Allen says that eighty percent of success is just showing up. Unfortunately, it’s not true in the world of public speaking.  I’ve seen far too many speakers — even those with a compelling message — defeat themselves because they didn’t prepare properly.  They thought they could just show up, deliver a well-crafted message, and win the day. It rarely works that way.  Audiences can tell when you’re “just showing up” and when you actually care about their wants and needs.  The key to preparing is to start weeks ahead of time and to listen intently to your audience.  Ask them open-ended questions and draw them out.  Get them to open up and then listen closely.  Remember: you must breathe in before you breathe out.  Now watch the video.

Sources of Argumentation – Beating Writer’s Block

What should I say?

What should I say?

While preparing for a public speaking engagement, have you ever had writer’s block? Can’t figure out the logic that’s most likely to move your audience? Or maybe it’s the opposite: there are so many possible arguments that it’s difficult to choose among them?  According to the Greeks there are seven basic sources of argumentation. In order of persuasiveness, they are security, health, utility, the five senses, community, emotion, and authority. Learn more about each in this week’s Persuasive Communication Tip of the Week.

Code Words & Tribal Grooming

You may not have noticed it but, throughout this video series, we’ve been talking mainly about deliberative presentations.  In such a presentation, you present a logical argument and your audience deliberates on it.  You’re recommending a course of action and trying to convince the audience of the wisdom of your logic.  There’s an entirely different animal called the demonstrative presentation — where logic is simply not needed.  In a demonstrative presentation, you’re building group solidarity, a sense of belonging, and esprit de corps.  It’s sometimes called identity politics. Jay Heinrichs calls it “tribal grooming” and logic has nothing to do with it.  Before you develop your presentation, you should decide whether you want to be deliberative or demonstrative. Learn more in this week’s Persuasive Communication Tip of the Week.

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